by pam | Dec 23, 2024 | Celebrating, Change, Health & Well-being, Women in Business
As the year winds down, December offers us a unique opportunity to pause and reflect—a chance to honor the journey we’ve traveled, celebrate our wins, and intentionally set the tone for the year ahead. For mission-driven women navigating crossroads, this process is especially meaningful. It’s a way to reconnect with your purpose, realign your vision, and step boldly into a new chapter.
Over the years, I’ve developed a simple yet powerful year-end process that has helped me and women I work with to transform transitions into opportunities for growth. Here’s how you can make the most of this reflective season.
Step 1: Reflect on the Year That’s Passed
Start by looking back on 2024. This isn’t just about what you achieved, but also about what you learned and how you’ve grown. Journaling about these prompts can help you uncover the deeper meaning in your experiences:
- What accomplishments am I most proud of this year?
- What am I most grateful for in 2024?
- What lessons have I learned about myself, my relationships, my work, and my purpose?
- Where did I face challenges, and how did I grow through them?
This step isn’t about perfection—it’s about recognizing your progress and the value of every experience, even the difficult ones.
Step 2: Release What No Longer Serves You
Before you can fully embrace the new year, it’s important to let go of what might be holding you back. Reflect on what you’re ready to release:
- Outdated beliefs or habits.
- Fear of stepping into your full power.
- Lingering doubts or regrets.
Consider a symbolic act to mark this release—write down what you’re letting go of and burn the paper or release it mentally during a quiet moment of meditation.
Step 3: Set Bold Intentions for 2025
Now comes the exciting part: envisioning what you want your life to look and feel like in 2025. Intentions are more than goals—they’re statements of alignment that anchor you to your values and vision. Write them in the present tense, as though they’ve already come true.
Here are some examples to guide you:
- Personal Life: “I live with clarity and confidence, fully embracing my gifts, strengths, and purpose. I trust myself to navigate life’s transitions with grace.”
- Health & Well-Being: “I feel vibrant and strong, prioritizing daily practices like yoga, meditation, and time in nature. I radiate energy and vitality.”
- Financial Abundance: “I earn $___ thousand monthly doing work I love. I feel financially secure and empowered to make a meaningful impact.”
- Spiritual Growth: “I am deeply connected to my inner wisdom. My meditation practice helps me stay grounded and aligned with my highest purpose.”
- Creativity & Intellectual Growth: “I approach life with curiosity and creativity, effortlessly bringing fresh ideas to my writing, workshops, and collaborations.”
Step 4: Review and Celebrate Throughout the Year
Your intentions are not something you set once and forget. Keep them visible—write them in your journal, pin them to a vision board, or save them as a note on your phone. Revisit them quarterly to check in on your progress and celebrate your milestones, no matter how small.
Celebration is vital. It energizes you and reinforces the belief that you are moving in the right direction. As you step into the new year, make time to acknowledge your growth and all you’ve achieved.
Why December Is the Perfect Time
December isn’t just the end of a calendar year; it’s a natural transition point—a bridge between where you’ve been and where you’re going. By taking time to reflect and set intentions, you’re honoring both the endings and beginnings that define your journey.
Ready to Step Into 2025 with Confidence?
I invite you to try this year-end process for yourself. Take a quiet evening to journal your reflections, release what no longer serves you, and set bold intentions for the year ahead.
Let’s make 2025 a year of purpose, growth, and fulfillment. Share your thoughts or intentions in the comments—I’d love to hear from you!
by pam | Nov 17, 2024 | Changemaker, Health & Well-being, Peacebuilding, Women in Business
Amid a world overwhelmed by conflict, division, and uncertainty, do you ever feel powerless to make a difference — or even to find peace within yourself? You may think there is little or nothing you can do to help build peace in the world. I believe there is much that you can do, and it may be easier than you think.
YOU have within you the power to help build peace in the world. When you learn certain tools and practice them regularly, you will find inner peace. When you find inner peace you can then build it in your family, community, workplace … the world.
What is Inner Peace?
I love this poem that for me describes “inner peace”.
Peace.
It does not mean to be in a place
where there is no noise, trouble
or hard work.
It means to be in the midst of
these things and still be calm
in your heart. (Source unknown)
What does inner peace look and feel like for you? Take a few moments to get quiet and ask yourself the question, “What does inner peace look and feel like for me?” Notice what comes up. Write down your feelings. You may also wish to draw or paint a visual of what you experienced.
For me inner peace includes:
- Feeling centered and grounded
- Feeling and believing that I am enough
- Feeling that I belong and am safe
- Believing that I am part of something greater than myself and am here to make a difference in the world
- Being grateful for all that I have
- Believing the Universe is friendly and here to love and support me
- Being okay with uncertainty
- Feeling loved and nurtured when I take time for myself (not feeling guilty)
- Standing in my power, confidently expressing what I believe, and asking for what I want (not worrying about what others think or say)
- Having balance in my life
- Being in touch with and regularly tapping into my creative side
- Knowing what my passions, core values and life purpose are, and living a life aligned with them.
It Starts with You
Here are some proven strategies and powerful practices to help you to find inner peace.
- Quiet your busy mind through yoga, meditation, listening to relaxing music
- Engage in a passion such as dancing, gardening, painting, where you lose track of time and focus on the activity rather than your “to do” list
- Participate in mindfulness practices[1] (such as walking meditation) that enable you to be in the present moment
- Forgive yourself and others
- Listen to and trust in your body’s wisdom, and use it to guide your decisions and actions (Notice how you feel around people, and also how they react to you)
- Be grateful for what you have
- Surround yourself with people who nourish you rather than sap your energy
- Spend time regularly in nature
I encourage you to choose two or three of the above strategies and begin incorporating them into your life on a regular basis, and notice what you notice.
Building Peace in Your Family, Community, Workplace …
I’ve studied and been trained in conflict resolution, mediation and facilitation. I’ve had the opportunity to live and work in conflict zones including Afghanistan, Colombia, Pakistan and Nigeria. From my experiences working with people from a variety of ethno-cultural and religious backgrounds, I’ve learned the following.
- Treat people with respect and greet them with a smile.
The simple act of smiling (genuinely) connects us with others at work, in our families, and communities. I’ve been in situations where I didn’t speak the language of the person in front of me, and yet we were able to communicate. A smile opens up that “conversation”.
- Realize that people’s negative behaviors are usually not about you, but rather about them, and their past experiences.
There is a reason for all behavior. Rather that reacting negatively when someone does something that offends or upsets you, pause, take a deep breath and say to yourself Isn’t that curious, I wonder why they did that? OR What is happening for them today? Do I remind them of someone in their past who they fear or dislike? So rather than reacting, try to understand where they’re “coming from”.
I recall a time when I was managing a large international project and a Canadian administrative support person was assigned to work with me. From the time we began to work together, I sensed a tension between us. She said and did certain things that were really upsetting, and I wasn’t sure why. I reflected on how I had treated her from the outset and couldn’t uncover why she was treating me so negatively. Then it came to me, I reminded her of someone from her past; someone who she had negative feelings toward. Sure enough, after she was reassigned to another project and I shared in a conference call with the technical team all the good things about her and her work (as she was competent), things began to change. This woman shared that her sister was always popular in high school, and had a similar body structure to mine. I sensed that this was a time in this woman’s life when she didn’t feel confident about herself and was jealous of her sister. She also shared that she was often in pain. After that conference call, there was no longer tension between us and she often sought me out to share coffee together. Perhaps you’ve experienced something similar?
- Be Yourself (regardless of who you’re interacting with)
Experience has taught me that if I am real and authentic with whomever I interact with, it is easier for me to truly connect with them. Their bodies’ sense when I am acting or saying things out of alignment with who I really am. When I am “speaking my truth”, they know.
Being yourself enables you to truly connect with others whether they be in your family, community or workplace. When you let go of preconceived ideas about others, and how you should act in certain situations, it is much easier to “find inner peace” and model it for others. I’ve been asked if I act differently when working with Muslim men and I say “no”. I respect their culture (for example by wearing a head scarf and loose clothes in Afghanistan), and I “speak my truth” when I’m with them. I believe they respect me for that. The same holds true with family members. Now that my children are grown, I make a concerted effort to respect them for their decisions and only to contribute my ideas when asked. This is indeed challenging at times, however, I am learning.
My Vision
I see a world free of war and violence.
One where all cultures and religions are accepted.
Where all people are respected and treated with respect;
Where people live together in communities that model the values
of contribution, collaboration, caring and connection.
Where people are truly connected with who they are and the gifts they have to share.
Where creativity is valued, and everyone knows how to tap into and express their creative side.
Where people have the courage to reach out for support when they need it.
I see a world where people trust their bodies, value their own wisdom, and know when and how to say no;
One that believes in the power of groups and synergy, that the whole is greater than the sum of the parts;
A world, where women and men stand together as partners.
What’s your vision? What will YOU do to help build peace in the world?
[1] A tool from Eastern psychology that I have found extremely useful for getting “out of my head” and into my body is Mindfulness Walking Meditation. Mindfulness practices focus on the senses and feeling sensations and emotions in our bodies. When we do mindfulness walking meditation, we feel the ground beneath our feet, the breeze against our face, the cool air going from our nostrils down into our lungs. We smell the scent of salt or the aroma of lavender in the air and observe the scenery in front of us. We try to stay out of our minds, and experience our senses. Rather than spend a walk in nature constantly thinking and processing all the things we have to do, instead we stay present and experience nature and all of its beautiful sights, smells, sounds and sensations.
2. A previous version of this article was published in the January 2017 issue of “Eydis Authentic Living magazine”.
by pam | Sep 26, 2024 | Collaboration, Feminine Leadership, Healthy Organizations, Leadership, Women in Business
What is a culture of collaboration and why is it important today? I share my thoughts on this in a recent post – https://old.pamela-thompson.com/is-it-time-to-create-cultures-of-collaboration/
What do I mean by collaboration?
I am particularly drawn to Barbara Gray’s definition: “a process through which parties who see different aspects of a problem constructively explore their differences and search for solutions that go beyond their own limited vision of what is possible”[1] (Gray, 1989, p. 5). Gray likens collaboration to a kaleidoscope in which the multiple stakeholders are the colored pieces of glass within a kaleidoscope that when turned may be likened to the outcome of a successful collaboration in which the whole is greater than the sum of the parts.
How can you as a leader nurture and support intra-organizational collaboration (i.e. collaboration within one organization?) [2]
- Believe in the power of collaboration and that two, three, or more heads are better than one. I recall when I co-chaired a national strategy in the late 1980s/early 1990s for a federal government department, how much I looked forward to and enjoyed our face-to-face meetings. I experienced the synergy that was created when representatives from diverse organizations and cultures got together, created a common vision, strategy and a plan for moving forward. That was when I realized the power of collaboration and “how a number of heads are better than one.”
- Commit to collaboration organizationally (e.g. make it one of your core values). Here’s a value from an organization I facilitated the strategic plan with. Partnership and Collaboration – We believe in the meaningful engagement of a wide range of stakeholders. We see our role as facilitators of multilevel, interdisciplinary and intersectoral cooperation and collaboration.
- Follow a tried-and-true process to develop and implement collaboration; (hiring a skilled, neutral outside consultant to facilitate the process is helpful, particularly if a project is complex and strategic). This includes creating a shared vision for the project, clarifying the purpose, goals, roles, accountabilities, timelines and some indicators for measuring success along the way. It is also important to trust the process.
- Identify the skill sets needed for a particular project and then recruit representatives from various areas/departments/divisions from across the organization to be part of this cross-functional and multi-disciplinary project team. Diversity of expertise, experience, and perspective is a key ingredient for successful collaboration.[3]
- Clarify for all participants how this project fits into the strategic plan for the organization. While working in Afghanistan and assisting the Ministry of Public Health to develop their first strategic plan, I also assisted them to revise their operational planning process and templates so that each department/division identified how their projects and various activities fit into the larger strategic plan (by strategic direction), as part of their quarterly and annual work-planning. This proved helpful for people at all levels within the organization and made them feel that they were part of something greater than themselves.
- Encourage learning and documenting lessons along the way. I’ve found it useful to have regular points within a project (e.g. bi-annually or annually) when the team identifies and documents through a facilitated process what is working well/ what is not/their concerns? And what suggestions can be offered to address the concerns? Make it clear to folks that it is okay to share concerns and to make mistakes and learn from them.
- Encourage and support creativity and “out of the box” thinking. Making it clear that it is okay to make mistakes and learn from them facilitates creativity and innovation.
- Create a high-level team for the collaborative project to report to (e.g. annually), and reward team members for a job well done.
- Encourage the lessons learned from each collaborative project to be shared with others within the organization so each project builds on the other, rather than “reinventing the wheel.”
I welcome your thoughts and questions on this article.
[1] Gray, Barbara. Collaborating: Finding Common Ground for Multiparty Problems. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1989.
[2] Note that these strategies also work for inter-organizational collaboration (i.e. between different organizations)
[3] Savage, David. Breakthrough to Yes – Unlocking the Possible within a Culture of Collaboration. Boise: Elevate Publishing, 2016.
by pam | Aug 27, 2024 | Feminine Leadership, Healthy Organizations, LeadinginUncertainTimes, Preventing Burnout, Women in Business
Now, more than ever, we need to create and nurture cultures of collaboration within our organizations and communities. The complex issues we are facing today such as climate change and systemic racism require multiple “heads” and diverse perspectives “around the table” to generate creative solutions.
In the past few years, more and more influential women are coming out publicly and acknowledging that they have burnt out. An example is Jacinda Ardern, the former Prime Minister of New Zealand who in January 2023, announced “I no longer have enough in the tank to do the job”, and declared that was why she was stepping down.
It is being acknowledged more widely that the traditional ways of doing business and being successful; of driving and striving, valuing competition over collaboration, and leading from our heads and egos rather than from our hearts, are no longer sustainable. Arianna Huffington, co-founder of the Huffington Post and founder and CEO of Thrive Global, has shared her story of collapsing from overwork and why she created Thrive Global. It was as a result of her experience of “working day and night” and the negative impact it had, and her desire to share that there is a healthier way to be “successful”.
In more than three decades of facilitating multi-stakeholder consultation processes and strategic plans, co-creating projects, managing large international projects, and founding and running a national not-for-profit, I have experienced the amazing power of working collaboratively and the rich solutions that result when people from different backgrounds and cultures work together toward a common goal. I have also experienced the negative impacts that can result from focusing on competition.
What is the difference between a culture of competition and one of collaboration?
A Culture of Competition
Looks like:
- Individuals are rewarded, rather than teams, for their performance
- Everything is urgent; priorities are unclear
- Organizational values are not clear or not “followed”
- Unclear vision; people do not see how they “fit in” or contribute to the organization
- Senior management makes decisions with little or no consultation with other levels of the organization
- Planning is “top down”
- Leaders tend to hire folks like themselves
- People criticized for deviating from the organizational norms and for their “failures”
- Unclear expectations about where work ends, and personal/family life begins
- Managers expect people to respond to emails and/or text messages evenings and weekends
- People consistently work more than 50 hours/week
Results in:
- Reduced employee engagement
- Reduced productivity
- Little if any innovation
- Reduced morale
- Extreme stress leading to Increased rates of absenteeism and sick leave … and in extreme cases burnout, chronic illnesses and what the Japanese call “karoshi” or death from overwork
- Increased conflict among employees and managers
- Stress on families and relationships …
- A reduced “bottom line”
Whereas,
A Culture of Collaboration
Looks like:
- Teams are rewarded for their performance
- Priorities are clear to everyone in the organization
- Organizational values are clear and people “walk the talk”
- The vision of the organization is clear, and people see how they “fit into” or contribute to the organization
- Senior management believes in and involves those closest to an issue to be part of the process to generate solutions to address it
- Planning is participatory
- Leaders are aware of their strengths as well as their weaknesses and hire a variety of people to complement their strengths and address their weaknesses
- People feel safe in the environment and are encouraged to voice their concerns and suggestions
- Leaders set clear expectations and model work-life balance (e.g. do not expect their direct reports to respond to emails and/or text messages on evenings and weekends)
- People are not expected to work more than a forty-hour week unless there is a critical issue or proposal, for example, that needs to be addressed/finalized
- Feminine leadership qualities such as: collaboration, inclusiveness, intuition, emotional intelligence and creativity are valued and modelled by those in leadership positions
Results in:
- Enhanced employee engagement
- Increased productivity
- Enhanced creativity and innovation
- Improved morale
- Enhanced health and well-being of employees
- Reduced tension and conflict
- An enhanced “bottom line”
I invite you to “weigh in” on whether you think it is time to value, create and nurture more cultures of collaboration and why.
Stay tuned for future posts on creating cultures of collaboration.
by pam | Aug 14, 2022 | Coping with Change, Embracing Change, Life Transitions, Women in Business
During the pandemic many of us had the opportunity to reflect on our lives and our work. Many realized their work was not meaningful. The loss of some family and friends put us in touch with our own mortality. Many of us realized the importance of “seizing the day” and living in the present moment. You may have decided to start that new business you’d been thinking about for a few years or leave the partner you’ve been with as you realized you were settling. In order to move forward as result of such reflections we need to reinvent ourselves.
What do I mean by “reinvention”? To me, reinvention involves letting go of beliefs, behaviors and fears that are no longer serving us and opening to new possibilities such as living the life of your dreams, starting that business of your dreams, and having the relationship of your dreams.
Based on my own journey and work as a consultant and coach over the past three decades I have discovered that reinventing yourself requires four key ingredients or elements:
- Mindset – Having what Carol Dweck calls a “growth mindset”; believing that you have the capacity to reinvent yourself is key. Being flexible and optimistic are also valuable qualities.
- Support – Having support from family and friends is important.
- Tools and Processes – To help you understand how you respond to change and why, and how to embrace rather than resist change (e.g., my 5-step “Art of Change Framework”)[1]
- Self-care – Having healthy habits such as eating well, exercising regularly, getting 7 to 8 hours of sleep each night, spending time in nature help to reduce stress and in turn boost resilience.[2]
How do you develop a “growth mindset” if you’ve noticed that you tend to dwell on challenges and tend to be pessimistic and a bit rigid in stressful situations (which is common for us all)?
Stay tuned for future posts. I’d love to hear some strategies you’ve found helpful to overcome challenges and be more open and optimistic when faced with the opportunity to reinvent yourself. I welcome your thoughts and comments below.
[1] https://old.pamela-thompson.com/strengthen-impact-world-dance-change/
[2] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/resilience
by pam | Jul 26, 2022 | Change, Coping with Change, Embracing Change, Life Transitions, Women in Business
What if you could reinvent yourself and live the life of your dreams?
What if you could leave your corporate job and start a business based on what makes your soul sing?
About six months ago I started hearing people use the words “I want to reinvent myself” or “I have reinvented myself.” I got curious and did some research on “reinvention”. I also reflected on my own life and realized how many times I have reinvented myself.
I’d like to share a true story of someone I know who reinvented themselves. Their name has been changed for confidentiality.
I met Donna at a Newcomer’s Club shortly after I moved to Victoria about five years ago. Donna shared that she had moved to Victoria with her husband and within six months of arriving, her husband, the love of her life, died of cancer. She realized she was dealing with a number of life transitions and signed up and attended a one-day retreat I did on “Embracing Life Transitions”. She left with more insight into how she responds to change and why, including a 5-step “Art of Change Framework”[1], and an action plan for moving forward.
Recently Donna shared with me that she is no longer the woman she was when her husband Ben died. She revealed that he was an extreme extrovert and she lived life “on his coat tails”. She reflected that when she got married, she was quiet and lacking in confidence; and that her confidence built being with Ben, and she counted on him for support.
Since Ben’s death, Donna began to work on herself and getting in shape. She acknowledged that over the past few years, she has felt like a single woman who is finding her new self. When she meets new people, she is Donna only, and that has impacted who she is and how she acts.
Donna and Ben sailed for more than thirty years. Ben was the captain. Donna assisted as crew. Since Ben’s death Donna decided she wanted to learn to be captain, and after a number of sailing courses she now not only captains her boat but participates in local races.
Recently, Donna revealed to me that she is no longer the woman she was when Ben was alive. She has reinvented herself and is now “Lady D”. She even christened her sailboat “Lady D”!
How did Donna reinvent herself and what does it take to let go of fear and reinvent yourself?
Stay tuned for the next installment!
Do you relate to Donna? Have you reinvented yourself? What is the biggest lesson you learned from doing so? I welcome your thoughts and comments below.
[1] https://old.pamela-thompson.com/strengthen-impact-world-dance-change/
